Mother has just declared that she couldn’t pluck a pheasant.

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I’d avoid the yellow snow, if I was you.

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@jolicloud Thanks. All working as expected now :-)

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@jolicloud Logged in on laptop to send this, logged in to jolicloud here too, reset password, added Facebook, still no dice. What can I do?

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@jolicloud I can no longer login to my netbook after #jolidrive update. I login as local user as normal, then get blank screen, no profile.

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Heading oop North for a few days to spend time with the natives.

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Or dead.

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Let’s just hope they don’t find those box cutters in @reality’s underpants. Silly place to hide them if you ask me.

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You’re a Fruit & Nut case.

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Vint Cerf? Is that his real name.

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Weeks of ceaseless procrastination have paid off as I finally got my all my coursework done and handed in 9 days late. Woot!

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This is the one I’ve waited for…Stones Roses tickets have arrived! Woohoo! (Now I just need someone to go with.)

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And how are your eyeballs?

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Not bad. Keeping my arse dry, which is the main thing.

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How to avoid a wet bottom on the train: identi.ca/attachment/753…

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Oh dear. What happened?

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At least Nani didn’t take his clothes off, which seems to be FIFA’s main concern: ur1.ca/czlbe [pdf]

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Ha! I’d forgotten about that.

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You should have asked for Richard Branson to deliver it personally, preferably dressed in stockings and suspenders.

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Which is what Southgate should have said back to him, instead of meekly, ‘It’s irrelevant, but it’s my opinion’!

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Fuck you, you poxy gobshite.

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Strictly speaking, according to the letter of the law, that’s irrelevant.

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The thing is, Keane is now just a rent-a-gob on the telly. Still, loved his put down of Southgate: ‘That’s irrelevant!’

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That’s taking the piss.

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I think he means ‘that Turkish Cüneyt’.

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